Letter published in Tomorrow's edition of the Israeli Yated Ne'eman newspaper, was reviewed by Harav Gershon Edelstein shlita
Some pointers
victims and their relatives should contact the competent authorities with information to be dealt with privately
• The media is not the appropriate platform you transgress public shaming and retzicha
• The responsibility of an ultra-Orthodox newspaper is also in what it does not publish.
The main point to be stressed is how pritzusdik the work environment has become, including (& many times, especially) Frum offices.
ReplyDeleteThis would never have happened (I'm speaking about the adult married women, not the abuse of children) if people would keep Halachik boundries like Hilchos Yichud, not chatting etc.
This is a huge problem, and no one seems ready to take it on.
I get your point, although it is completely irrelevant to this case
DeleteThen you're clearly uninformed about many details of this case.
Deleteyou dont get it , when a woman is going thru personal difficulties & a male therapists is devoted & helpful he becomes her lifeline. and the therapist being the one in power has the achrayus to stay far & clear ...and ofcourse not to advance ...
DeleteEhrliche bosses set tznius boundaries but the office culture of corporate America has seeped in to our machaneh.
ReplyDeleteA few frum companies in Lakewood recently held year end holiday parties for their workets mixed with employees mingling all over the place, light headed entertainment and a very not frum atmosphere.
Yes its an issue. Speaking from firsthand experience (from 2 different offices I've witnessed)
ReplyDeleteR Shmiel Neiman from Monsey was the ultimate authoriy on "tzniyus and Yichud" in the workplace. However, some "kanoim" decided he wsnt "frum enough" so they beshmutzd him and nebach he needs a refuah shleimah. Now, the workplace is completely hefker,
ReplyDeleteWhat do you mean he needs a refush shelaima? They harmed him?
DeleteYou don't become the authority by declaring yourself one nor by bucking years of halachic precedent.
DeleteHe had an aneurysm, and needs a Refua Shleima
DeleteHis name to daven is שמואל בן שרה פערל
if it's kept private, nothing gets done to address such topics.
ReplyDeletein the current story, although it was an open secret, nothing was done for 20 years, until Haaretz published it. only then was it dealt with in tzfas by a non charedi bais din, not in bnei brak, and the accused still completely denied everything completely and was free to do as he wished. it was only once the police opened an investigation and the recording was released, that CW knew the game was over.
if not for the Haaretz article nothing would have been done.
without publicity noone does anything. also it's difficult to prove these things without police powers, and victims in the frum community are many times not willing to accuse anyone for reasons we all know. so when it's kept quiet there will be no progress.
You have no idea of how much gets done in private, because it is done in private. Bnei Berak has a method of dealing with Melamdim and therapists for years, and it could have been used for CW. There was no need for this publicity.
DeleteThat is what people who join lynch mobs say too: There is no other way for justice to be meted out and this danger to society must be removed. It's probably safe to say that in many cases lynch mobs are correct in their accusations. It still does not justify them or their mentality.
DeleteBtw cw was cleared by the Israeli police and took a lie detector test which he passed which not one of his supposed 22 accusers were willing to under go how come why not doesn’t it sound strange that none of the accusers accept one was heard personally by this Bais din so they based their psak on one accused one??
DeleteWhile tznius boundaries for the workplace should be strictly adopted, counseling situations can unfortunately create a pitfall.
ReplyDeleteToday you wont find anymore men counseling ladies or girls in private. there is much more awareness grom both ends. Its a different society
DeleteThe husbands are not aware of the lax tznius standards their wives are exposed to in some offices. There should be universal minimal halachic guidelines or standards that everyone should follow.
ReplyDeleteIsn't texting and smartphones the problem
ReplyDeleteno. it's long sheitels.
DeleteRav shmuel Eliyahu told a Bais din of Rav Nissim Ben Shimon in Tel Aviv that he did not hear testimony feom the witnesses first hand.
ReplyDeleteSo how do I explain this to my 16 year old daughter? And 9 year old son?
ReplyDelete
ReplyDeleteI hate to say there is a saying ain chochom kebaal nisayon, there is no wise man as the one who has been tested(proved).
Let’s go there, I can't disclose all I want to so I will leave guess work for you.
Have you ever seen Bochurim davening shachris without a talis at 70+ years old?
Has it ever dawned on you the embarrassment they go through every shachris they attend the last 50 years?
Have you been one of the oilem golem, who blamed them for being too picky etc.?
Do you realize that they may have been molested as kids, possibly by their Rebbi or father or both?
Do you realize that if they would have disclosed their father, it would have ruined them (in their mind) more, & ruined their sibling’s chance of getting married?
The fact that siblings did get married & they didn’t, could be there was reason they were molested, and not the others. Or even if the others were also molested, molestation is like corona virus it has a different effect on all its victims from asymptomatic all the way to death.
cont.
https://www.inn.co.il/news/536582
ReplyDeleteThey were singing a very different tune when he was still alive.
DeleteHad he said he is sorry during his lifetime people would have said that he destroyed too many lives, he is only saying he is sorry because of the accusations and all sorts of other nasty things. Guilty or not he did not have the option of doing Teshuva, saying "I'm sorry" and bringing the issue to a close
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1lQjyvHzd7ynjDXEFl-iEmiJo2I71Nk1b/view
ReplyDeleteReb Yitzchock Berkowitz
https://www.torahanytime.com/#/lectures?v=173791
ReplyDeleteRabbi Zimmerman