Weather: 82°Mostly cloudy.
- NWS:There is a likely risk of severe weather today. Wind, tornadoes and hail are possible, but wind is the greatest threat. Stay aware and be prepared.
- Reminder Change of routine don't forget baby in car
-Wagner group leader Yevgeny Prigozhin has claimed his mutiny was a “masterclass” in how to launch an invasion, and showed Kremlin leaders that he could have seized Ukraine within a day.
-BDE: Petirah of 25 year old bachur Shimoin Brauer Z"L who was niftar on a flight from London to New York: he was going from his home town of Stamford Hill, en route to volunteer at a summer camp in the US, suffered an asthma attack around 45 minutes before his plane was due to land in New York. He had an attack and fell unconscious and the crew attempted to give him oxygen, unaware that his airways were closed due to the asthma. The crew then attempted emergency CPR but tragically were unable to save his life. (News reports)
- Today 7 Tamuz, is the yahrzeit of Rav Yitzchok Kleinlman zatzal R"Y in St Louis and than Lakewood. Talmidim and mishpacha will have a minyan for Mincha at the kever in Lakewood at 6:00 pm followed by a seudah at Buckwald Court Lakewood
- Rav Binyamin Finkel shlita will visit Rav Malkiel Kotler shlita at his home after 5pm
- Today Asifa "Ashreichem" for the children of the heimish mosdos of Lakewood on technology related matters will take place at the Lakewood high school auditorium with the attendance of Roshei yeshivos admorim and roshei mosdos.
- A Delegation of American Roshei Yeshiva will be traveling to Eretz Yisrael to discuss the issue of shidduchim facing singles in the US. Among those going the Novominsker rebbe shlita, Rav Mottel Dick shlita and others. They are meeting with Rav Moshe Hillel Hirsh shlita as previously discussed there was a proposal to eliminate a grade in either Mesivta or Bais Medrash by helping to lower the age gap as it will have bochurim begin shidduchim earlier by trimming off a year.
- Heavy traffic Girls day camps begin expect late morning traffic with new bus routes car pools.
- Rav Binyomin Finkel shlita spoke at Kollel Ohr Shmuel in Lutzk BM this morning he will visit several yeshivos and chadorim later today and through the week. Tomorrow evening there will be a asifas chizuk with the mashgiach for parents of children struggling with contemporary issues. It will take place at bnos Devorah hall 9:30pm
-R' Aaron Lang To reform Lakewood, first BOE. Need friendly BOE to help get formula right. Twp Comm. later. Listen, study, experts, hearings, recommend best form municipal gov to balance interests, campaigns financed per 1st Amendment, allow the people to have final say when they care enough.
- Rav Malkiel Kotler shlita greets Rav Binyomin Finkel shlita at the Tachnology asifa for the chasidishe mosdos in Lakewood (photo credit to photog)
-Video Rav Binyomin Finkel this morning at Kollel Ohr Shmuel in Lutzk
Photos below
No one asked me for my two cents but the thought of eliminating a year of mesivta or Beis Medrash not because it is good for the bochurim but rather because it is good for the shidduch crisis sounds like the type of thing that has heavy potential for unintended consequences and causing unintended problems.
ReplyDeleteAs you said no one asked you so please keep your comments to yourself. We are dealing with the lives of thousands of bnos yisroel and no one should be doubting those who are finally seeking solutions.
DeleteOne of the rebbes of gur once said that parsha that Yisro added to the torah is ואתה תחזה even though he started talking earlier, and the reason is that bringing up problems and complaining everyone can do, the gadlus is to come up with solutions אשרינו that we are finally seiing the roshei yeshiva stepping up to the plate and they deserve all the chizuk in the world whether we agree that the solution that they want to implement is the best one or not.
Why can’t the girls have another year of school and start shidduchim later?
DeleteEliminating the first year bais medrash is fine, as it is some rosh yeshivas are saying first year shiur, in the rest of the yeshivos you basically kill a year waiting to get into the rosh yeshivas shiur.
DeleteGoing to eretz yisrael to consult is just a photo op, you feed them any info you want and get your answer. That's why most roshey yeshiva and laymen ignore most directives emanating from there. R Shmuel kamenetzky r Meir stern r Eli ber and others have as much a deah as r Moshe Hillel Hirsch they have no reason to be mevatel daas to him or anyone else there.
R Lang, like R Harold have great ideas but poor delivery. If they are to facilitate real change, they should develop a real committee with a real team and a thorough campaign. There are many people that are ready for change, but won't vote for candidates that seem shaky. If either are interested, let me know on these pages and I will gladly get in touch and involved.
ReplyDeleteI'm in,and I will donate Today $1000 to start a campaign for Real Change
DeleteBefore we form a caucus I need to speak with Rav Elyahu for da'as Torah on this before we get viable candidates with experience in municipal matters. The Rosh Yeshiva, Vaad (since 2016) and some Roshei Mosdos are still trying to convince the tyrant to compromise but he has been unrelenting so far. I will know where we are going in time to get candidates by the July 31 deadline, but should they show any indication of success beforehand, I am not going to accept any kind of do-nothing position just for a higher salary, which is all the he will accept, at most. I want reasonable a amount of responsibility in management, or at least, the ability to consolidate my capacity to hold the district accountable. The district can become a powerhouse of opportunity and an engine of growth for generations and we have been squandering the opportunity.
DeleteDon't compare me with anyone in Lakewood, please. I am up against the full might and power of the State of New Jersey without any of help from the oilm. No one did a thing to help. Our work is on a different playing field. The governor is fighting us because he thinks the SFRA is in danger of collapse. The truth is that the SFRA is safe, he should settle with us if anything. Anyway, all districts should have the opportunity to follow our lead pursuant to the promise of the SFRA and the NJ Constitution. I went about it alone without anyone from Lakewood helping and I am now delivering to you, poor delivery or not, a once in a century opportunity for reform. And even if I am not involved in elections, should Inzelbuch give up some control, there still is a vacuum of power on the useless BOE which the people need to fill.
I should not say no one from Lakewood helped me. Rav Elyahu, Shlita, connected me with Rabbi Zeev Rothschild ZT"L, who was the patron of everything good in Lakewood, and did not have to "break some eggs" like Robert Moses in NYC, doing his projects (Lakewood mikeh, Bais Elyahu, co-op, gemach, list goes on), a man who never wanted to be recognized for his greatness, and compensated anyone who brought any tai'na of financial loss, who quietly stood for all that is right, also was my support and patron, and advised me until Purim 2020. He also got me my co-counsel (I had three one after the other), Dan Grossman, Esq. and the demographer that testified.
DeleteMy point is that we are so far-gone into inert and ineffective government unreceptive to the people, particularly with the BOE that is completely dominated by a special interest, which in turn is controlled by one man, that we need to simply just win elections first before like anywhere else. Then we can start discussing what kind of permanent reforms are necessary to balance all interests and factions, We I was young man in school getting my degree in Government at the University of Texas, before coming to BMG, I heard a lecture by a member of Common Cause. He said that despite all the lobbyists and contributions to campaigns, and whatever else is wrong in American politics, ultimately the people always will prevail when they are so inspired. It may not be aroused every time, but the power of the people is always there. The perfidy of the BOE is a historic opportunity for the people to make known their will.
ReplyDeleteThere's an easy solution to shidduch crisis: organize get togethers for young men and young ladies to meet. Can specify ages.
ReplyDeleteWill put the shadchanim out of business. Shadchanim are only good for the groise families, the well off.
That's how our grandparents and Avraham, Yaakov Avinu and Moshe Rabbenu.
Aside from the fact that Avraham, Yaakov Avinu and Moshe Rabbenu did not marry girls who they randomly met at singles events how would it help the crisis? If both girls and boys were facing the same crisis it would be helpful but when it is only the girls, then the same of girls will end marrying the same amount of available boys with or without singles events. The only ones who it could help would be the girls who are having difficulties due to lack of family connections but then other girls would suffer in their stead.
DeleteMore contemporary matches also happened this way. Young people attended the same shuls, parents were friends, girls came for Simchas Bais Hashoeiva...Leaving singles almost totally at the mercy of shadchanim means that the rich and famous or their yeshivisher moral equivalents get the attention while the modest, plebian homes get ignored or passed over.
Deleteאלוקיהם של אלו שונא זימה
DeleteAmazing how some have a mental block and they cant seem to get it. There is an age gap and therefore not enough boys. All the solutions in the world are not going to help unless we have enough boys for our girls to marry. Get it? If you still dont, ask anyone with a daughter in shidduchim how many serious suggestions they received. The answer will shock and horrify you. Guarnteed
DeleteAnon 8:52.
DeleteThere is no shortage of single's events. Whoever wants to attend one is free to do so.
I hate to say it, but the real villain here - as usual - are the wealthy. Why are they not offering rewards for, lets say, the first two bochurim in every shiur who gets married? Why do the bochurim have to stick their necks out but the wealthy people who are not willing to offer a small amount of money which will create a major change?
DeleteIf people married those whom they wanted to, age would be a non-issue. Only because we have shadchanim as gatekeepers did the age issue become so central.
DeleteWhy can’t the girls have an extra year of school and go into shidduchim later?
DeleteAnon 10:37
DeleteI haven't heard of one singles event in Lakewood area in years. Last week's Asifa for the women in shidduchim was for women only. Were any shadchanim there?
Anon 1:40.
DeleteThen we need to set up a fund paying for the transportation of boys or girls who want to attend singles events outside of Lakewood.
We need to support Aaron Lang
ReplyDeleteAaron is one of the only citizens in Lakewood with Clear signs of Brilliant Intelligence and Selflessness and A Walking Kiddush H', whereas the current FRUM leadership,represents Greed,collusion, Stupidity,shortsightedness and Constant Chillul H,They enable theNazis around us
ReplyDeleteGo ahead influence your area & relatives.
DeleteGet beyond this echo chamber
Chillul H' Alert,yesterday's Asbury rag paper questioned Lakewood how they can afford their $1000000 goldenboy Atty and yet everyday they're running to Trenton begging for more $,Another fine article fanning the flames of HATREDbut U know our all wise leaders have a Fruma Chesben allowing Daily Chillul H
ReplyDeleteApikorsus. There sure is enough boys for girls yes we have a problem don’t have an easy answer how to rectify the problem, however the age gap is NOT the issue
ReplyDeletePure רשעות ואכזריות to write this statement without any proof. How do you know that the age gap is not the problem if it seems like a simple mathematical equation. Rav Elya Ber is as smart as you and he is sure taht it is the problem and he doesnt feel that its apikorsus
DeleteEven if there is an age gap . It is completely unscientific and unthorough. No one took in consideration mental illness For example which is far more prevalent in females ,that alone can Satisfy the difference. Anorexia of Bulimia depression, Obesity et cetera . Some of these conditions are 10% for prevalent in females. By the time you're done you might actually have a shidduch crisis for boys!
DeleteEven if there are less boys than girls the fact is there are hundreds of boys available, over 26 and unmarried.till you work your way through them There's simply can't be a numbers problem.
Because if you believe in hashem than there can’t be any person in the world taking away your husband.
DeleteWe usually learn this concept in first grade
There are hundreds of boys but there are THOUSANDS of girls!!!
DeleteThat still doesn't answer the fact that there are a 100s boys and no takers...
DeleteWho are you referring to?????
ReplyDeleteWhat happens if Ch"V the shidduch crisis won't be solved after they mess with the Yeshiva system
ReplyDeleteWhat if there's a huge divorce crisis created by marrying off singles that are not ready?
There has to be a level of Bitachon without tcheppereing the shteiging in learning of yeshiva bochurim.
I have yet to see the slightest evidence of a 'divorce crisis'. There were always a percentage of people who got divorced shortly after the Chasuuna. The dating system isn't perfect. Can anyone show me that the percentages increased?
DeleteIt is a myth that the age gap is the cause of the problem. You want to make changes to the system, then the obligation is on you to prove it
ReplyDeleteSo where do the numbers disappear to? What happens to the extra class of girls?
DeleteNumbers don’t marry each other, people do - specifically boys marry girls. By shouting from the rooftops about the age gap without real proof that THIS is the root of the problem, you are making matters WORSE. Anything that detracts from getting to the real cause of this problem, just makes the problem worse
ReplyDeleteReal cause is that most girls want long term learners and not enough boys fit the description. Convince the girls to marry lawyers
DeleteIf that were true then girls who don't want long term learners would have a very easy time in Shidduchim. While they do have an easier time than an average girl looking for a long term learner , they don't have it so easy that a girl not looking for a long term learner has no worries when it comes to the shidduch crisis.
DeleteWill this great technology gathering add to the purity of our children or just make it more alluring to find out what people are screaming and shouting about how powerful and exciting and alluring it is?
ReplyDeleteThere are other underlying issues that are contributing to the shidduch crisis but nobody wants to bring it up.
ReplyDeleteWe have become a society of class warfare with some who would never be meshadech with someone they consider beneath them the rich will stick to rich and the choshuv to choshuv and the feinshmekkers with the sheinshmekkers that leaves the simple people with nobody wanting to look out for them. If a RY would marry someone from a simple family who would make a great wife and rebbetzin that would do a lot for people to not be picky and date anyone who is a match instead of having a system of high society.
Why pick on the Roshey Yeshiva and tell them to set the example ? Why not the rich guys? As a fat baal habos without a lot of money I'm not sure me doing a shidduch with a Rosh Yeshiva is a good idea but I don't see the issue with doing a shiduch with a Rav Kaspa. Plus if you have a choshuver bocher whose father is a fat baal habos most Roshey Yeshiva would be a lot quicker to take him for an eidim than most gevirm would take the child of a lo yutzluch.
DeleteWhat an asinine stupid statement!
DeleteWe were always a society of class 'warfare' (where's the war? Just class differences). Rich married rich, RY married RY, and simple married simple. What's the problem? How are simple people different from the rich? Everyone has someone similar to them, nobody is an island.
There's a hashkafa gap between boys entering shiduchim and girls enter shiduchim. That is at least 80% of the problem, the remaining 20% is an age gap issue. Most "older" girls that got married, got married when they realized they need to look beyond their ideal or desired "type" of boy.
ReplyDeleteTrue there are other issues as well but the age gap is not a theory rather its a fact. See this video with an open mind and you will understand. It is simple mathematics. https://mytat.me/v169104
ReplyDeleteAnd to all the nay sayers I ask, what are you suggesting be done? Nothing?!! The situation is getting worse by the day as the population increases so the number of girls affected keep on increasing. It is a disaster that is affecting the best girls from the best of homes.
What drives all the people fighting change? It is sickening. Before you comment, understand that you are ruining the lives of thousands of bnos yisroel and one day you will deeply regret because if you have no hear and you dont care about others, know well that your actions will affect your daughters as well and your daughters will suffer the deafining silence that thousands are suffering from at this moment.
THINK BEFORE YOU SHOOT OFF YOUR STUPID AND INSENSITIVE COMMENTS!
As the population is BH exploding maybe there will be more boys to even it out
DeleteIt is a fact that there is an age gap. It is NOT proven that this is THE cause, or part of the cause of the crisis.
ReplyDeleteGenius Comment! It is a fact that there is an age gap but its not proven that its a cause. Do we need proof that ten boys cannot marry 15 girls?? Do we need to prove that?? What is the agenda of all these holocaust deniers?? i dont get it. לא תעמוד על דם רעך!!
DeleteBefore screaming "AGE GAP", read this article. https://mishpacha.com/the-truth-behind-the-numbers/
ReplyDeleteThe numbers in this Mishpacha article are not representative of the lakewood type yeshivish community. Perhaps it is true if you include the general yeshiva community which includes many very different types (chofetz chaim etc) but in our community (which is very different than those other yeshiva communities) there is no doubt that the amount of single girls in their upper twenties far out numbers the single boys by a huge percentage. Whoever is not blind sees and knows that
DeleteDon't confuse me with the facts.
DeleteBefore screaming not age gap and pushing the continued ruination of thousands of bnos yisroel, watch this:
Deletehttps://mytat.me/v169104
Lookwood unfortunately is "missing" many boys thereby causing a gap, because of the OTD rate.
DeleteThe study discussed mishpacha by doesn't show that the age gap shidduch crisis doesn't exist. It merely says that it is exaggerated. In addition, the study suffers from some obvious flaws. For example: Instead of asking, "What percentage of 40-year-old women are married, it asked what percentage of 40-year-old women were EVER married." The problem is that plenty of women married divorced guys, which doesn't solve the shidduch crisis, because then divorced women have a hard time of getting married. I listed around ten fundamental problems with the study. But even without those problems, the study admits that there is an age gap shidduch crisis, just that it is smaller than some believe.
DeleteThe Mishpacha article is as stupid as it gets.
DeleteBecause they marry by forty, it is not a problem? Is it not a crisis? Are they nuts or something? Getting married by forty isn't a serious problem?!
Think about this, a gvir or Rosh Yeshiva will take a metzuin from a simple family, but a amazing girl from a simple pashut family will never be looked at for a gvir or Rosh yeshiva's son. I think this mentality is part of the root of the problem.
ReplyDeleteThe shidduch crisis is simple. The quality of the boys are not on par with the girls. As a father with a girl in shidduchim I look at the boys and they are nowhere near where we were at that age.
ReplyDeleteHow are your boys??.??
DeleteYes, but those boys are going up, you on the other hand.
DeleteIf Lubavitcher can Marry Stamar and Litvaks will marry Chasidim and Modox will marry ger and Chofetz chaim won't intermarriage there will be enough boys and girls
ReplyDeleteEven if there wasn't any age gap,the problems would still be there.
ReplyDeleteHence its at most a minor factor
Reportedly there 10000 more single males than females in the West Bank
ReplyDeleteMany are of American background
Why is everyone avoiding the truth. Just say it - it is all about money. The boys and their parents want to be supported. So no matter how much social engineering you do to even the playing field the boys won’t consider girls of lesser means
ReplyDeleteI know plenty of girls of lesser means who are married. And girls with means who are single...
DeleteSheker gass! Sin'as am ha'aretz letalmid Chacham!
DeletePeople don't get supported any more. It doesn't work like that. Torah haters like you are constantly looking to find problems with Torah learners. ורוח הקודש אומרת כן ירבה וכן יפרוץ.
Voting for Albert Ackerman will solve the shiduch crisis, just as voting for Albert solved all other problems.
ReplyDeleteTo solve the shiduch crisis, every boy should marry two girls, the way it used to be. We should go back to our roots.
ReplyDeleteIf you marry a girl much younger, you won't want to trade her in when you are old. Doesn't make too much sense to marry same age. LOL
DeleteCome on. The situation now is how the uneducated rich oligopolists and their chashuve intermarried relatives like to keep it
ReplyDeleteThe only way for a regular girl and regular potential spouse to have a fighting chance making it presently is her going for advanced degree, credential profession, experience, first coming up for air in her early thirties
So what does everyone expect?!
Before marriage,during marriage,or between, (half)?
Delete