The Shaila that stumped the great Posek of all time
Failed initiatives to solve shidduch crisis
Halachic and ethical boundaries for Rabbinic interactions with women
The one student who built up HG”R Nochum ז”ל The State of Israel's scorn of the chareidim
The one student who built up HG”R Nochum ז”ל The State of Israel's scorn of the chareidim
The Roshei Yeshivas of the eight year programs aren't willing to budge.
ReplyDeleteAs such, we need to open new Yeshivas where the program ends after six years, rather than eight years.
That would at least give bochurim the option to start shidduchim earlier.
It's incredible that when there are hundreds if not thousands of boys over 24 running around where we all can see we still have this erroneous idea that somehow there's not enough boys.... Buying into unproven theories is probably the biggest impediment for us to get our act together and realize what the real problem is Chinuch!
DeleteThere is still an obligation on us that there should be an equal number as much as possible; Reb Moshe Feinstein says that the Torah didn't prohibit a "eunuch from the sun" because it would cause a marriage squeeze.
DeleteClearly, the fact that there was always single boys doesn't allow us to allow while a vicious marriage squeeze destroys our girls.
Yes we must definitely do something about the problem but the first task at hand is to figure out what the actual problem is there is no data to back up the actual ratio imbalance as being the main issue.
DeleteYou also need to make sure that boys getting married earlier will not cause other serious problems down the road. Yes, the shidduch crisis is a serious problem, but bochurim are not pawns to be moved around to fix a demographic imbalance. If getting married earlier is genuinely better for them, make that case. But pushing boys into marriage earlier , primarily because doing so may improve the prospects of girls, risks solving one crisis by creating different ones. The welfare of one group cannot be protected by treating the best interests of the other as an afterthought.
DeleteWe don't need an "actual data" to tell us that there is an imbalance. Simply call any Lakewood Shadchan and ask them if they have more boys or more girls.
DeleteIt is due to the lopsidedness that shadchanim are the strongest in favor of boys starting younger.
If someone buying $100 roasts on Shabbos because it isn’t included in the din of Rosh Hashana also has that attitude when it comes to paying their children’s tuition and pays every penny on time without asking for deductions that is admirable, but if it is only when it come to Shabbos food then they aren’t really on that level of bitochen.
ReplyDeleteSupposedly Reb Chaim ztl said that haggling with tuition committees (likely because there is no accountability and the amount of tuition asked is arbitrary) is normal hishtadlus and therefore not a lack of bitochen
DeleteIn Lakewood it is not arbitrary or no accountability. Most schools have their tax returns online. Rabbi Forcheimer told me (when I felt that the school was overcharging me and they claimed they spoke to him) that I should look at their tax return, deduct fundraising costs then divide the rest of their costs by the number of children in the school. That is the amount I need to pay for each child in the school. (but they can not demand more from me)
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